confidence...

It seems mine is slowly rising. i dont know where it is coming from. I remember when paul and i were first dating and how i would make sure my whole outfit matched... even if that ment going to vickis or freddys and buying new matching sets... then we got married and had kids and it was just crazy from there. I noticed more weight gain and more of me losing myself. I cant describe the feeling of losing yourself and your self worth. it is like you are taken into this dark vortex and you have to fight your way out.

I have been doing that this last 19 months. I had my surgery. I have been taking better of myself. I am finding my inner beauty and working on accepting my outer self.It has been long. I am so tired of having to work so hard. I am so proud of where I have come to.

I dont know where this coming from but i will take it...